A long awaited Hack Wilson newsreel.

It's been a while since we've done one of these. Let's see what we can find...

The Taliban has officially endorsed General McChrystal's replacement, General David Petraeus, saying he "is not smarter" than McChrystal. We'll see about that.

A Cape Cod school district is under fire for a policy that allows handing out free condoms to elementary school students. Not only that, but parents of children requesting condoms are not allowed to be notified. Liberal America, at its finest!

A Jewish dance group in Germany had stones hurled at them by a group of unruly teenagers. No, they were not neo-Nazis. They were....can you guess? MUSLIMS. Of course.

The Blackhawks and Cubs have decided to make an appearance in the Chicago Gay Pride parade. I just have one question. WHY?

A Planned Parenthood (Murderers R Us) sex ed demonstration at an Iowa high school that featured graphic sex acts and correct condom placement with a fake you know what has parents pissed off. And rightfully so! Just think, your tax dollars funded this!

Amid World Cup fan fervor, the Mexican flag is being proudly displayed throughout the entire city of Los Angeles, Mexico.

The Iranians have pussed out after vowing to send more aid boats to Gaza. Apparently they don't want to deal with the Israeli blockade now...

PETA has offered to help rebuild the Jesus statue that was destroyed by lightning last week, as long as it bears a vegan message. Church says no thanks.